Each of us comes from different families and with this comes the knowledge that our view of the world is different. Because it is human nature to experience the world and see the world through our own eyes, it is crucial to be able to navigate it in such a way that we are able to meet our goals.
With this knowledge, it requires us to identify our own barriers. What will be placed in front of us not to block entirely, but to make us work harder? What are the road blocks, the full stops, and the free passes?
For example: I wear glasses. This means that I cannot do certain jobs, but there are many other jobs I could choose from. Some other barriers that we have are because we choose to limit ourselves because of work ethic, perceived inadequacies, etc.
In this week's blog, I want you to write about your own barriers and what they keep you from accomplishing. Then I want you to look at the ones you put into place and think about how you can push beyond the barriers. Once you have written about yourself, I want you to think about a character you have read about this year. Examine their barriers and how those barriers were created, and how those barriers were overcome.
In my life I have dealt with many barriers. One of the biggest barriers I have dealt with has been my anxiety. I was diagnosed with anxiety when I was 9 years old and have been a several different medications to help deal with my anxiety. Due to my anxiety for the longest time I struggled with my confidence and my ability to put myself out there. Up until my junior year I was always afraid to talk to new people and try new things. The littlest things as going to a friend’s house for the first time or having a conversation with a teacher would be the most nerve racking thing. Luckily over hte past year I have been able to gain more confidence in myself. I am able to be more social without having a mini panic attack each time. I still have the tendancy to ask about questions about up coming things again and again but I am improving on that. I still struggle with presenting projects and things from time to time, but it definitely has improved. I’m still not 100% confident in myself or my abilities, I still second guess my work and ideas and will never be happy with everything that I turn in. However I stopped caring about what people think and have learned to just be me and everything is not the biggest event. Part of my improvement is due to a new medication, part is due to work with a counslor and part of it has just been me working on discovering who I am. I discovered many music artists that I find comfort in, I found passion in music and writing, and stopped caring about “fitting in”. I am who I am and I am happy with that.
ReplyDeleteOf course there is also the fact that I have to wear glasses pretty much 24/7 because I am literally blind without them. I can’t change that it is too late but what I am going to do. On the plus I think my face has formed to fit glasse so without them I look weird. The amount of times they have fallen off at dance is too many to count but I think everyone has learned that they may come flying off my face. I would rather wear my glasses then risk hurting myself or others so glasses it is. Plus if I were to get contacts it would be the biggest pain because my prescription is so strong it would just cause me more stess, why bother.
The narrator in Invisible Man faced a barrier who could not change, his skin color. Being an African American, even to this day can cause challenges. He was looked at as a lesser person than everyone else and had to work harder to go to school and to find a job. When he thought The Brotherhood wanted him to be a spokesperson it got him excited. He thought he was actually going to helping bring change to New York. However he learned the truth that they were just using him for their own personal gain. He decided to just go out on his own. He was going to use his invisibility to his own advantage and find his own purpose in the world. He was not going to let anyone else decide what he was meant to do. It did not matter how long it took he was going to figure it out on his own. The invisibility was not going to be a barrier it was going to help him be successful.
From time to time I find myself lacking. I lack motivation and determination to be great at something I love to do. Whenever I am practicing routines for magic, or practicing guitar, or even typing an essay for A.P. Literature, I always discourage myself. I get frustrated, frustrated because I am not great. However, I have come to realize that there is greatness within me, that greatness takes time to develop. Patience has never been my strong suit with anything. Patience is a virtue, and without it you will become stuck like I was. Yet there is still always a fear lurking within me that I will be good enough, and that there is someone better than me. Nonetheless, I know that there will always be someone better than me. I have learned to use that fear to fuel me and motivate me to become better. The barriers I face are only mental, and can be broken down with perseverance and hard work. In the words of Tim Notke, “Hard work beats talent, when talent fails to work hard”. With motivation and determination I can strive each and everyday for greatness. The challenge that can stop me, however, is trying to it. So everyday I look at my lock screen on my phone and say, “I can, I will, I must”.
ReplyDeleteIn the play, Waiting for Godot, by Samuel Beckett, the character Estragon has a barrier in his life, that doesn’t allow him to be free. That barrier is Vladimir. Without Vladimir, Estragon would have left and forgotten about Godot. However, Vladimir always has to keep reminding Estragon that he can’t leave. He reminds him that they have to stay and wait for Godot to come. Estragon is unable to be free because he is chained to an 1,000 pound ball called Vladimir. Estragon was almost free, when both Vladimir and Estragon were contemplating suicide. However, they never go through with it and remain waiting for Godot. Vladimir is a barrier that Estragon was never able to pass or break through.
At times, I am hindered by the internal struggle of finding my initiative to get something done, experience something, or go beyond my day-to-day routines. I oftentimes have difficulty in finding an eagerness to accomplish my goals for the day, leading to things being done at the last minute, late, or not at all. This internal battle I face with self-motivation keeps me from working towards my ambitions that envision myself achieving, it often contradicts the person I aspire to become. I repeatedly tell myself that I won’t wait for a deadline to creep up, not let the hours in a day to expire, and stop opportunities to experience something from fading away, yet I often feel blocked from pushing past these things out of a lack of motivation, poor time management, and procrastination. I feel that I am constantly confronted with this struggle because I am constantly striving to accomplish things that I am obligated to do and that give me little sense of reward or accomplishment even when completed early and on time. I feel like the solution to this problem is twofold. Firstly, I must fill my day with engaging activities/tasks, and whether they are hobbies, interests, passions, etc., I will feel a sense of purpose in what I’m doing each day, helping to motivate me. And as for my obligations, the things I dread doing, or what “has to get done”, I believe that developing a sense of reward when accomplishing these things will accelerate the process, and this reward may be a physical, literal reward to myself, or a mere mental reward of triumph. Feelings of personal reward will morph into feelings of accomplishment, fueling my enthusiasm and motivation.
ReplyDeleteThe character Hamilton within the musical Hamilton faced many barriers in the early days of his life. He was confronted with a weak family structure, as he was an orphan. He was impoverished and alone on an island in the Caribbean, where he was burdened by natural disasters and a discouraging community. And yet, despite all these unfortunate circumstances, Hamilton was able to make a name for himself in America due to his willpower and determination, even despite further doubt expressed by his friends and colleagues. Hamilton was a true testament to the notion that among all things, mental fortitude and perseverance are some of the greatest ways to battle barriers.
Maybe I should start this essay later I thought to myself. It won’t take too long, or at least I don’t think it will. Yes, just like many others, I suffer from an internal monster called Procrastination. We have a love hate relationship; he’s that type of friend that always wants to have fun and never gives you your personal time. Sometime, he’ll tempt me to go out, or play video games. He swears he’s providing me with the time of my life, suggesting that the “other things” can “wait.” But I soon realize that his temptations lead me to a restless night, periods of several short power naps, and put me in a state of a half sleep-half awake reality. Maybe it’s because of my past habits that I led myself down this pathway. I have sworn to myself year after year to overcome this drastic monster that lies within me, however, I have found myself unable to do so. Procrastination is my leech, sucking out all the fun, yet, keeping all the work with me. He’s mastered the craft of delusion and will never leave your life without proper action. Thus, until I am able to befriend Motivation, I will be unable to leave Procrastion.
ReplyDeleteOne character that relates to my barrier is Hamlet. Before seeing the ghost of his father, Hamlet lacks motivation and has no desire to further himself in anyway. This causes the play to become elongated and dramatic, Hamlet’s inability to take action although he seeks action. Thus, when Hamlet sees the Ghost of his father, he is motivated to take action, more specifically revenge. Although revenge should never be the greatest motivator, this part of the play shows the need for a dramatic event to change a procrastinator. Without the Ghost, Hamlet would be unable to change, and thus unable to take action.
One barrier that I’ve had to deal with in my life in indecisiveness and reliance on others. This has been more prominent now as graduation approaches and I have to choose colleges and start to sort out my life. At times I am either lack full confidence in my decisions or second-guess, always wondering the possibilities had I taken a different route. At times I am so unsure and nervous to make a decision I choose to do nothing at all or try to avoid it. Other times I have someone make the decision for me or choose based on what others have done. As I got older I realized that my life would never be mine if I continued to live this way, and I wouldn’t be doing what makes myself happy. I had to overcome this by looking inside myself and truly considering what I want to accomplish, and not letting anyone else influence that.
ReplyDeleteIn Notes from The Underground the narrator has similar barriers to me. He is so absorbed in consciousness and overthinking that he fails to make decisions or do anything. He calls this state inertia and this is the barrier separating him from society. At one point he overcomes his barrier, acting completely different from usually. He is very sociable and invites himself along with some schoolmates to dinner and to drink, when he meets Liza. He tries to push his philosophies on Liza and criticizes her choices and prostitution, in doing this later he regrets it when she runs off never to be seen again. This one failure, causes the Underground Man to return to his initial state of inertia in fear of failing again, and agony of losing Liza. Though the Underground Man showed that he could overcome the inertia once, the new barrier he created for himself is his past, which he refuses to let go of, dooming him to be trapped alone until he moves on.
One major barrier that I have faced in my life is health issues. Since I was a child, I was always hurt or ill. I’ve had strep throat, sinus infections, and the flu thousands upon thousands of times. I am also a huge klutz and have needed stitches and crutches multiple times. It seems like my health problems couldn't get worse, until I found out I had a tumor on my left tenth rib. I had to have multiple procedures. I had biopsy to see if I had cancer, which luckily I did not. But a huge surgery followed, which I had a bone graft on my rib and they took pieces of the tumor out. Another major injury that I have had was last year, which I got an awful concussion from rugby and needed to see a specialist. The funny thing is that today, I spent three hours in the emergency room, which I have something wrong with my large intestine and I now have to see a gastroenterologist. My sicknesses have really taken time away from school, which I get behind, making everything very stressful for me. Being in AP and honors classes, this has been a huge struggle because the work load is greater and the tests are more difficult for me to make up. I have also missed out on rugby practices and games due to my many health issues. I have not really overcome these barriers yet, but I plan on taking better care of my body, hoping that improvement will come.
ReplyDeleteA character that has many barriers is Oscar, from the Brief Wondrous life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz. Two major barriers that Oscar had were weight issues and a poor self esteem. Oscars issues became present due to his fuku, which is a family curse. Oscar’s fuku became evident after he had dated two girls, being morally wrong. This “curse” brought on Oscars weight and acne. Due to this, Oscar struggled to fulfill his dream of having a reciprocative love. Junot states,“Senior year found him bloated, dyspeptic, and, most cruelly, alone on his lack of girlfriend”(Diaz 29). Oscar’s lack of a girlfriend helped bring on his depression and poor self esteem. Females would call him a “gordo asqueroso”(Diaz 17), meaning fat and fitly, which shows how the rest of society viewed him as well. Eventually, Oscar’s poor self esteem drove him to commit suicide, but it was unsuccessful. Oscar never really overcame his barriers until he met Ybon, which she accepted him for him, and he finally received that reciprocative love. At the end of the novel, Oscar’s life would be taken from him, for being with Ybon, a woman in a relationship. But none of this mattered to Oscar, he had felt love and that was all that he ever wanted to accomplish.
One barrier I find myself always running into is the lack of motivation, not out of laziness, but out of fear. I tend to always question whether I am wasting my life away completing things that mean nothing, essentially. What am I going to gain if I do this math homework? Why am I wasting so much time trying to perfect this art project, why does it matter? I have come to realize that refusing to do anything will lead to a dull lifestyle. Motivation is what urges the excitement for what is to come, whether it be a good grade or something else. The responsibility to set up achievement and pride for the future is what drives my purposeful work ethic. This does not belittle the amount of fun I can have, however, it only encourages. This barrier is always overpowered by the incentive of success; the idea of what could be, and what should be, gives me the motivation to work hard. The understanding of simple math homework can lead to an A on the test, and a gateway to college.
ReplyDeleteOne character that has faced, and overcame, barriers is Hamlet. Shakespeare characterizes Hamlet as a bitter and self-deprived youth, reflecting a dark and depressed -esque from his demeanor. This is all until the ghost gives him insight on what really went on with his father’s death. This then brought the motivation of revenge into Hamlet toward his uncle. The realization that his father died in an undeserving way is what motivated Hamlet to take action against his uncle, choosing to attack him using through the play that he presented. The reality check brought upon Hamlet is what allowed him to overcome the self-barriers that were set upon him, which leads to the idea of tragedy being one of the greatest motivators for an individual. Tragedy leads to a drive to accomplish what should be, in this case, avenging his father is what Hamlet seeks to fulfill.
The barriers that I’ve constructed for myself have to do with a sort of constant internal struggle, convincing myself that certain talents or attributes never quite live up to expectations, all while avoiding the work that could be done to get myself to that level. For a long time I was unhappy with things like my class rank or where I sat in my orchestra, but I couldn’t get myself to put the work in that would yield better results in these areas. I would get so wrapped up in the long list of things that need to get done that I’d simply push everything away and do something completely unrelated, talking with friends or playing video games. This gets frustrating at times, especially when the only thing holding me back from getting what I want is my own self-criticism. I really don’t procrastinate, but it’s hard to explain the difference; everything always gets done on time and with a decent quality, but nothing truly ever represents what I know I could have achieved if I had taken more time and poured more of myself into whatever the thing may be. This has kept me from being proud of much of my accomplishments and the things that I have worked on in and out of school, solely on the basis that I don’t feel as though the recognition has been deserved. Perhaps it is just the drag of high school that has sucked this motivation for excellence out of me, and hopefully college will reawaken it.
ReplyDeleteI see a barrier most literally in the characters of Brave New World, particularly in Bernard Marx, who is an Alpha Plus born with a slight deficiency that causes him to be different from the rest of his peers. He has been raised with little to no knowledge of the world, no way of coming up with his own unique ideas or breaking the mold that has been created for him. Throughout the novel he struggles with this, not fitting into his society but also not having the tools necessary to overcome his difficulties. About halfway through this novel, he makes a breakthrough by using John as a method of securing his own fame. He feels wanted and liked-- the trademark of success in his eyes. However, Bernard almost does a 180 in the second half of the novel, turning into the type of conformist that he had originally detested. Instead of using his barrier to springboard into a discovery of self, he uses it as an excuse to back away into the “easy route,” taking soma and living like a true Alpha. In this way Bernard and I are almost opposites; I am fully aware of what I have to do in order to achieve greatness and wish I had the motivation to do so, while Bernard wishes he had no awareness at all and would rather sink into the homogenous pool of other Alphas than stand out.
I sometimes find myself disinterested in some of the things I do. My disinterest mainly seems to stems from me wanting to do other things that interest me. And whenever I do work in something I don’t have interest in, I have a tendency to not really do my best work and so I then usually have to make up for my lack of effort somehow. And from these consequences, what is always a cost from my disinterest is my time. The time I could be using to do something that I love. In order to overcome that barrier of disinterest, I just need to do my best and not just get the task finished with in order to be able to achieve and do what I want.
ReplyDeleteA character that had barriers was Bernard or Helmholtz in Brave New World. The barrier in their case was the norms and the ideals of their society not fitting with them. So they just lived their lives not being satisfied with it, but they only were satisfied when they began to question their “utopian” society and when John was introduced to the utopia. And after Bernard and Helmholtz questioned and began to take action against the ideals set by their society, they seemed to understand their reality and were satisfied with what they have done instead of going through the motions of their old life.
My biggest barrier is how easily I can become overwhelmed with emotions. It is so easy for me to completely become consumed with how I am feeling. This is a barrier for me because while being consumed with feelings I often blank and cannot remember how to complete a task. This has been something especially difficult for me to cope with in Track. My first throw completely determines how I will do the rest of the meet because once it is bad I get trapped in my head and cannot get out. It is frustrating because it's almost like I don't know how to control my emotions.
ReplyDeleteOne character effected by a barrier is Dorian, from The Picture of Dorian Gray. His barrier was his easily influenced mind. Because he did not know how to think for himself he got completely consumed by Lord Henry. If from the beginning Dorian would have taken Henry as a mad man, he would have been able to escape his unfortunate events.
One barrier I’ve always had to deal with is my mental illness. As a little kid I was diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder and then anxiety in middle school. I was put on medicine for seven years to deal with my ODD and from that I have had problems with my memory and ability to focus. These side effects are something I’ve dealt with for years, and it’s always been a struggle. Even when it comes to just conversation, I lose track of what I’m saying often and go on tangents and forget what the point I was trying to make was. It affects everything I do because I forget so much and need extra energy put into staying on task. I big improvement has come through journaling and making notes of everything. By writing everything down, it helps me work on retraining my brain to focus and helps when I forget things, because it’s all written down. The more I write, the better I can push through, so I need to keep pushing myself to write more and more, beyond just journaling. I’m never going to be at optimal functioning, but I’ll keep doing what I can to keep improving.
ReplyDeleteAngelica Schuyler faced a lot of barriers in Hamilton. One of the biggest was simply being her father’s eldest daughter. Because of that, she lost a lot of her free will, leaving her to leave behind the man she loved to marry a fuddy duddy loyalist. Another barrier was her love for Alexander. This love for Hamilton was created when she met him in “A Winter’s Ball” and fell in love with his wit and charm. However, she let her sister, who she loved dearly, have him instead because she couldn’t bear to hurt her. Still, she remained close to Alexander, perhaps closer than typical in-laws, as seen in “Take a Break”, creating the potential to ruin her relationship with her sister, even though she says her sister is one of the most important people to her. This relationship becomes her defining factor in the play until after the Reynolds Pamphlet where she calls him out for hurting her sister and is able to move on with her life, and return to what was truly important to her, family, as seen in how she helped Eliza throughout the rest of the play.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteOne of the biggest struggles that I face is time management. Throughout high school, every time I am given an assignment, I have a grand plan to get it done early, so I don't panic at the last minute. But at the same time, I always know in the back of my mind that I will wait until I absolutely have to do the assignment if I want to turn it in on time. Although I always seem to manage, and I never have missed a deadline, I know that I can do better. If I gave myself a proper amount of time to work, who knows how much better my grades would be? Would I have an A in AP Lit? Would I have received a better grade on my AP Euro test? But still, I put things off. As a result, I accept less than I know I can achieve. Even with scholarships, I know that if I do good on them I can get money for college, but I still wait until the last minute. But the only person that is hurt there is me.
ReplyDeleteIn Shakespeare's Hamlet, Hamlet struggles to make a decision as to what to do about his uncle, and as a result he puts off doing anything. Because of this, Hamlet's attempts at revenge fail, and he ends up hurting other people than his uncle, as well as himself instead. This reminds me of myself, as again, I feel like Hamlet's accidental murder of Polonius is like my consequences of procrastination. Who knows what would have happened if Hamlet had not doubted himself, and who knows how well I could be doing if I didn't wait until the last minute for things, just as I am now, writing this post two hours before it is due.
One of my biggest barriers is lack of motivation and confidence. I find my self very often doubting myself and my abilities. I also often find it hard to speak in front of others for fear of judgement. I also have a very real fear of expectations and meeting expectations and then in turn stress too much and overwhelm myself. I feel that these often stop me from reaching my optimal potential.I also feel that I am often very unmotivated to finish work when I don't enjoy it. I get bored very easily and sometimes forget my responsibilities just because i don't quite find them interesting enough.
ReplyDeleteOne character I felt showed barriers would be Dorian grey. Dorian Greys barrier was his reliance on lord Henry to formulate thoughts. Dorian often would only contemplate things after lord Henry had already mentioned them. Dorian learned his vanity from lord Henry which was one of his main downfalls. Dorian felt that beauty was everything only after he met lord Henry. Lord Henry was Dorians greatest barrier because he blocked Dorians mind from thinking on his own and it caused Dorian to become selfish and unkind to others. Lord Henry also represented a block for Dorian as he blocked Dorian from Basil, who actually had good intentions for Dorian.
My biggest barrier is not one that I have created. It is a mental illness that I cannot escape for the rest of my life. My depression comes in a form that is not common and remains as a constant battle. It has kept me from experiencing the world around me and enjoying the things I used to love. I lack interest in forming or maintaining friendships/relationships, leaving the house, or doing simple tasks. The topic is still hard for me to talk about and I find myself constantly over analyzing any thing that has happened to me in a day. I find it hard to push the barriers, but my support system reminds me to. By using coping mechanisms and sharing my feelings, I feel myself bottling up my emotions less. This has allowed me to become closer with my family and maintain a healthy relationship with my boyfriend. I now share what is on my mind to keep from the overanalysis and ultra lows from the unbalanced levels of serotonin.
ReplyDeleteFrom these experiences, I would compare myself to Raskolnikov from Crime and Punishment. His barriers were created from the uncertainty he built within himself. From not sharing his feelings and experiences, he drove himself ill with the thought of his murders. Raskolnikov’s trust he developed with Sonya allowed him to share his emotions and actions. He admitted to the murders and no longer found himself ill. He felt certain with Sonya and her guidance allowed him to change as a character into someone who could find happiness again.
I have ideas that could solve many of the problems I see around myself. I could regale people with interesting stories that crack them up. I could be the perfect sister, daughter, or friend. But I don’t always live up to that potential. Something holds me back. Something tells me that my ideas are not worth announcing in public. Something keeps me from sharing my interesting stories. Something stops me from giving all I’ve got and taking all I need from my closest relationships. Even though I know that I can be so much more, deep down I have a nagging feeling that I’m not worthy of greatness, accolade, pure joy, and happiness. Low self-esteem is keeping me from living my life to the fullest. Slowly, I’ve come to realize that self-esteem has nothing to do with being gregarious or shy. It comes from a place much deeper, from within myself. As a consequence, there are no quick fix solutions or magic pills that can improve self-esteem overnight. On the other hand, if I consciously commit to conduct myself right, no matter what the situation is, I can permanently increase my sense of self-worth.
ReplyDeleteOne character that is also affected by the barrier of low self-esteem is Hamlet. The biggest obstacle Hamlet has to face in the first three acts is his own hesitation about whether or not to kill Claudius. Hamlet's morality adds a great deal to his delay in murdering the current king. One of Hamlet’s biggest drawbacks is that he tends to think things out too much. Hamlet does not act on instinct; however, he makes certain that every action is premeditated. Hamlet suffers a great deal from melancholy; this in turn causes him to constantly second guess himself. He overcomes this barrier by looking at himself in the mirror and working to be in love with the person he sees, the person who has been through so much and is still standing. He began to not tolerate disrespect, not even from himself.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteLike many others I have biological mental deficiencies that pose as barriers to my will, these being ADD, ADHD and OCD. I am lucky to not suffer from major depression, anxiety or a lack of a confidence or self esteem and especially not a lack of motivation or passion, but I would argue that this neural concoction presents a much worse possible fate. I would rather greatness never be an option than be teased with it. I can and have unambiguously demonstrate greatness and the potential for it in my actions, but these learning disabilities and mental afflictions often make my brain feel hijacked by irrational fear and an overwhelming sense of dread or anguish tied to specific actions. Some may attribute my creativity to my OCD, but this is as far from the truth as it can be. Whenever my mental health is for the worse, I can hardly read a restaurant menu let alone write or read full texts. It also leaves me feeling very lonely in my mind, that no matter how much you try, you can never fully breach the gap between my conscious and yours, and that you are unequivocally alone, which leads to the number of things one must avoid. Ultimately when I present myself as incompetent and incapable, I am stuck in a thought spiral of intrusive thoughts that I cannot separate myself from and everything within my life becomes defined by this. This leads to the feeling of being cursed and or toyed with by the universe. To be able to demonstrate greatness but never fully able to execute it and consistently rely on it as a part of yourself feels teasing. There is an inconceivable amount of minute, idiosyncratic elements of someone that makes them great or successful, and often times I feel these are the things that I cannot assume that make all of the difference, only if I could fully be inside of the world and in reality could I feel and than acquire them could I become great.
ReplyDeleteI associate this complex most with Hamlet, who is a tortured genius. He has the motive to kill his father, the ability and the means to, and yet he cannot. Whenever he tries a half-hearted attempt finally, he kills Polonius, an innocent man, which effectively makes him reside to doing nothing seeing the result of his actions. His overthinking and though spirals of the meaning of life and the point of doing is what prevents him from fulfilling his destiny. He is not depressed and he has confidence in his ability I feel, but it is these spirals of his thoughts on what he must do and how that is his tragedy. He has the sword right in front of him and the means to kill, but his tragedy is he does not have the will to take revenge until he is literally about to die himself. Hamlet's mind is taken over by madness and he clearly goes into spirals in his soliloquies, where there is plenty he could be doing and that matters but he chooses to live inside of his mind. He is also tortured that no one can understand him, that he is completely alone in his affliction, which is damning to his own success.
I think some of my biggest barriers are internal. For years, one thing I have struggled with is socializing with people my age, not because I don’t want to but because I am often too self-conscious. Many times when I’m in a group of new people, I am afraid to speak up or engage in conversation because I’m afraid I’ll be deemed the “weird” or “awkward” one, the one that no one else wants around. Even now when I’m in a group of peers I’m familiar with, I often feel like the “odd one out” and I feel fairly disposable, like it wouldn’t matter if I was there or not. I know I shouldn’t feel this way, and I’ve gotten better about not feeling this way so much. But it can be challenging when my insecurities interfere. I think there a couple things I can do to get past this, though. First off, I can simply surround myself with people I know I’m comfortable with and I won’t have a problem being open around. Also, if I just learn to be more confident in myself and worry less about what other people think, I’ll be able to socialize easier. That will just take some mental practice.
ReplyDeleteI think the Underground Man’s biggest barriers are also internal. He has a very narrow and almost conceited view of other people. He believes himself to be a more intelligent being than others, and thus he looks down on others who he deems not as intelligent. Furthermore, he lets his over consciousness keep him from interacting with people as he overthinks social situations and interactions. Therefore, the Underground Man creates his own social anxiety and makes himself rather socially awkward, and to avoid others he shuts himself away from society. The Underground Man is almost able to overcome some of these barriers when he meets Liza and invites him over to his house. But in the end he shuts her out, too, and is unable to get past his social barriers.